Why Children of Divorce Grow into Broken Adults - Erica Komisar
Updated: Apr 17
Video from Chris Williamson
Why Children of Divorce Grow into Broken Adults - Erica Komisar
"Erica Komisar is a psychoanalyst, parenting expert, and author.
Why do we assume kids will be okay after divorce? As separation becomes more common, the long-term impact on a child’s development is often overlooked. So what actually happens, and can divorce ever be done without damage?
Expect to learn what most adults misunderstand about how deeply divorce affects kids, why constant parental conflict causes damage to children so deeply and what it does to a child’s stress system and brain development, why 50-50 custody might be a terrible idea for children, what the long-term psychological consequences are from a neglectful parent and much more…' from the video introduction
0:00 Why is Erica’s Work So Controversial? 1:22 The Hidden Impacts of Divorce on Children 4:19 How Stress Reshapes a Child’s Brain 11:05 Is a Friendly Divorce Still Damaging? 14:22 Is 50/50 Custody Always the Right Choice? 22:13 Should Fathers Take a Step Back After Divorce? 26:18 Is There Ever a Right Time to Divorce? 30:52 How Divorce Shapes a Child’s Future 33:04 Boys vs Girls: Who Does Divorce Hit Harder? 34:57 Is Separation During Pregnancy Dangerous? 42:02 Why Children Blame Themselves for Divorce 50:47 Divorce Feels Like Grief For Children 52:25 When Should You Tell the Kids? 54:26 The Worst Ways to Explain Divorce to Children 59:27 Why Promises Can Backfire 01:01:19 What Makes a Divorce “Good” or “Bad”? 01:05:22 Why Stability Matters More Than You Think 01:08:31 How Much Time Should Each Parent Get? 01:14:15 Why Babies' Needs Must Come First 01:19:06 How Parents Can Stay Emotionally Steady 01:21:36 What Secure Attachment Really Looks Like 01:27:58 How the Feminist Movement Left Children Behind 01:35:09 Is Daycare the Worst Place For Children? 01:38:21 We Can’t Ignore Early Attachment 01:40:13 Are Attachment Styles Inherited? 01:41:17 Are Babies Born Aggressive? 01:49:54 How Children Cope With Absence 01:53:25 The Hard Truth About Sacrifice in Parenting 01:59:34 The Toughest Realisations For Modern Mothers 02:09:16 Why Trust is the Foundation of Parenting 02:13:17 The Hidden Challenges of Female Breadwinners 02:23:26 Why Emotional Presence Matters Just as Much as Physical 02:29:33 Where to Find Erica
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